Warning: May be offensive to everyone.
Buddhism for Bogans
Buddha was just a normal guy who tried stuff and thought about stuff. Afterwards, he told people about the stuff. The were four things he was pretty sure about:
-because you make it suck
-you can stop making your life suck so much
-by doing these things I tried
He thought these eight things were the way to go:
Stop thinking about what life, the world and other people should do, it’ll piss you off when they don’t.
Don’t try to make people do what you want, it won’t work and people won’t like you.
Say it like it is.
Don’t make stuff more complicated than it is, don’t read something into everything.
Your job probably sucks – do it properly anyway, you lazy shit.
Stop fighting everything, go with the flow, chill the fuck out.
Pay attention to what you’re doing, don’t live with your head up your arse.
Sit still and be quiet sometimes instead of playing Nintendo. You don’t need to stimulate yourself 24/7.
If you do all this, you can get to nirvana, a constant state of not-a-single-fuck-was-given-that-day.